Falling For An Unbeliever

You meet an amazing person and just like that, you fall for them. They have everything you want and more. It seems like this person isn't even real.

Tall | Dark | Handsome

Fresh cut | Beard Connects | Nice Teeth

It happens. It's almost inevitable. We are soul beings so we are capable of having emotions. They have the whole package and you are sure you have found "the one." That is until one single factor comes and disqualifies them from being bae.

They are NOT saved.

In other words, they don't know the Lord. You guys aren't equally yoked. Not even “chill saved” or “newly saved.” It's okay. We’ve all been there. And may still even be there. #Guilty

Here is what you should know when you find yourself head over heels for an Unbeliever

1. Don't feed into it

It is so easy for us as humans to dream and imagine the future, especially when we found someone who captures our hearts. But that's it. They have captured our heart. Our deceitful hearts.


The heart is deceitful above all things And it is extremely sick; Who can understand it fully and know its secret motives?
— Jeremiah 17:9 AMP


Our emotions are valid, but we must also discern when they are not of God. Having feelings for an unbeliever can happen, but understand that God doesn't desire a relationship to be birthed from it. Don't have any hope or faith that this will end well. It's not God’s will for you two to end up together.

“Promise me, O women of Jerusalem, not to awaken love until the time is right.”
— Songs of Solomon 8:4 NLT

2. God isn't holding out

Many times when we like an unbeliever, it could be because there isn't another person similar to them in the Kingdom. God has you surrounded by many believers of the opposite sex. However, for some reason, a person that is “off-limits” is desirable in your eyes.

Sounds familiar?

Eve made the same mistake.

Adam and Eve were advised to eat of any tree in the garden of Eden, but the tree of good and evil. However, she saw the tree of good and evil and desired that, despite its possible consequences.

“The woman was convinced. She saw that the tree was beautiful and its fruit looked delicious, and she wanted the wisdom it would give her. So she took some of the fruit and ate it. Then she gave some to her husband, who was with her, and he ate it, too.”

‭Genesis‬ ‭3:6‬ ‭NLT‬‬

Unlike Eve, we must realize that God isn't trying to hold out on us. We have to be careful not to be led away by our desires. If we aren't cautious, this could be a threat to our walk with the Lord. He is actually protecting us from the dangers of being unequally yoked and possibly, backsliding.

3. Saved ones are the best ones!

I know it sucks, there isn't that many men that look like Idris Elba in the Kingdom. Trust me, I checked.

Jk. Not about checking, but about how saved men look. We can't let our eyes deceive us. Same thing applies to men in regards to women. Our attraction may have been initiated by appearance, but it's a Godly character that will anchor us. 

“Charm and grace are deceptive, and [superficial] beauty is vain, But a woman who fears the LORD [reverently worshiping, obeying, serving, and trusting Him with awe-filled respect], she shall be praised.”
— Proverbs 31:30 AMP

*applies to men as well*

Although God loves us all uniquely, He desires for His children to have equally yoked partners. So although your dream partner isn't in the Kingdom, God’s best for you is. And at the end of the day, God has never failed us. His judgment is always best.

Just be patient for everything to be beautiful in its time.


One day God will give us godly marriages, for those of us that desire to marry. Godly marriages that glorify the Father one day. Marriages that encompass His faithfulness towards us and reflects the love of Christ towards the Church. Until then, let's continue to kick it in The Friendzone. We got time to enjoy this season before it ends.